start of the semester

.... and I already feel like I need a vacation.

reminders

How can we embrace poverty as a way to God when everyone around us wants to become rich? Poverty has many forms. We have to ask ourselves: "What is my poverty?" Is it lack of money, lack of emotional stability, lack of a loving partner, lack of security, lack of safety, lack of self-confidence? Each human being has a place of poverty. 

That's the place where God wants to dwell! "How blessed are the poor," Jesus says (Matthew 5:3). This means that our blessing is hidden in our poverty.

We are so inclined to cover up our poverty and ignore it that we often miss the opportunity to discover God, who dwells in it. Let's dare to see our poverty as the land where our treasure is hidden.

-- Henri Nouwen

goosebumps

How is God's word so amazing?

Ephesians 6:10-18

10-12 And that about wraps it up. God is strong, and he wants you strong. So take everything the Master has set out for you, well-made weapons of the best materials. And put them to use so you will be able to stand up to everything the Devil throws your way. This is no afternoon athletic contest that we’ll walk away from and forget about in a couple of hours. This is for keeps, a life-or-death fight to the finish against the Devil and all his angels.

13-18 Be prepared. You’re up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it’s all over but the shouting you’ll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them. You’ll need them throughout your life. God’s Word is an indispensable weapon. In the same way, prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open. Keep each other’s spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out.

know thyself

There are times when I have so much going on in my life and head that I have to stay away from people because I'm too tired to hold my tongue. Basically, I have to stay away from situations and people whose actions or words might tempt me to say things like, "Can you please use your brains for five seconds?"

See, I know my weakness.

If I can't hold my tongue, I need to say no to non-work related situations and shut myself in until I get enough rest and peace in my soul. Until then, I am only allowed to spend time with friends who are dear to me. And yes, people who think before they speak.

Rewiring

My prayer director: "You know, you might be so used to fear and anxiety you literally need to re-learn what is relax and rest."

So. True. 

Resting in God's promises is different from "crashing."

wholeness

I know, this seems so unlike my usual intellectual self. But I don't think the intellect and the spirit are opposed. There is a great deal in psychology and sociology that mirrors spiritual truths, and God made the body, mind, and spirit to work in unity.

I am so, so impatient. I want to run like Usain Bolt, but the wounds on my feet aren't fully healed yet.


More about nightmares:

"As followers of Jesus Christ, we have complete spiritual authority to demolish the works of the enemy against us when we pray in the name of our Saviour. So it is the same with demonic nightmares. But first, we must repent for clinging on to any offensive acts or objects that give Satan a foothold to torment us.

1 John 3:8 ESV  ... The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the works of the devil.

Luke 6:18 ESV  ... And those who were troubled with unclean spirits were cured."

nightmares

Last night, I had a dream where demons were present and attacking me and people around me. The funny thing about this dream is that I wasn’t scared and in a way I “made” the dream come back a second time so that I could do a better job of battling the demons and convincing the people around me that we were battling demons not human beings, and that we need to be prepared. I don’t want to make light of demons, and the dreams weren’t a walk in the park. I wasn't fearful, but I was pretty tired and when my alarm rang, I felt exhausted even if I went to bed at a good time. I still find it funny that I dreamed about making the dream come back a second time so that I could improve.

As someone who has been plagued by nightmares for a lot of her adult life, it's remarkable to note how my dreams are no longer filled with fear even when there are demons and spirits in them. Still, I hope I have fewer of these kinds of dreams!