Had dinner with some friends tonight and I am SO STUFFED. The deep fried salt and pepper squid was really yummy, as was the chicken with salted fish and eggplant. And after that, we had Purity ice-cream. My tummy still hurts now!!! I really shouldn't have eaten so much.
I had a meeting with Prof X on Fri morning and it was a very helpful meeting. Prof X hasn't been very involved in my work this past year and her lack of engagement has been difficult for me. I was really happy that she decided to be more present! I only have a week left so I don't know how much I can do but even if I don't address all the questions she has raised, I can still think about the questions when I have more time to revise the dissertation, i.e., when I get to UCLA.
Oh yeah, my friends are in consulting and they said I should check it out and think about changing fields. I'm not terribly fond of math but problem-solving sounds fun . . . . I have a lot of reservations about consulting but when I have time I should look it up a little, just in case I don't get a job in academia!
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
can't help myself
I'm kicking myself for not using my time better during the past 6 years. Funny, now that I'm finishing up, I'm finally beginning to understand what graduate school's about. I wish I could do grad school over--I would have made very different choices.
But I shouldn't be thinking about this. I need to finish writing.
But I shouldn't be thinking about this. I need to finish writing.
Monday, June 23, 2008
the worst grad school horror story ever
I've heard many horror stories from fellow PhD students, but this has to be the worst one I've heard so far:
My roommate's mom met up with my roommate's high school friend's dad and asked him how the friend was doing. The friend used to be a grad student at Up_nn where he studied alternative healing and Buddhism. After he finished writing the first chapter of his dissertation, he turned it in to his adviser. His adviser looked at him and said: "Show it to me only when you've finished writing everything." So this friend went back to his office and after a year and a half of writing, he took his completed dissertation to his adviser. His adviser read the dissertation and then said: "I don't like it. Do it over."
The friend left grad school and is now a consultant in some company in Japan, probably making tons and tons of money. True story!!!
My roommate's mom met up with my roommate's high school friend's dad and asked him how the friend was doing. The friend used to be a grad student at Up_nn where he studied alternative healing and Buddhism. After he finished writing the first chapter of his dissertation, he turned it in to his adviser. His adviser looked at him and said: "Show it to me only when you've finished writing everything." So this friend went back to his office and after a year and a half of writing, he took his completed dissertation to his adviser. His adviser read the dissertation and then said: "I don't like it. Do it over."
The friend left grad school and is now a consultant in some company in Japan, probably making tons and tons of money. True story!!!
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
to the end
I will be turning in the final draft of the dissertation to my profs on July 5 and 7 (one prof needs it on the fifth and it will prob contain more typos and errors than the later version). My oral defense has been set for July 14. I'm so tired now that a part of me is happy to just turn in what I have now even though I have so much more to do!
Other than that, not much to report except that my cross-country reservations are almost all in place now. And I'm taking weekends to watch bad Hong Kong TV shows . . . I need something fun and mindless. One of my CF friends will be organizing a white-water rafting trip and I really hope that works out!
Other than that, not much to report except that my cross-country reservations are almost all in place now. And I'm taking weekends to watch bad Hong Kong TV shows . . . I need something fun and mindless. One of my CF friends will be organizing a white-water rafting trip and I really hope that works out!
Friday, June 13, 2008
another lesson on placing Christ in the center
From "Families With Grace in Place," Jeff Van Vonderen, pages 102-103:
Callie came home on the bus one day and said that bunch of kids were making fun of her. She was sad and scared, and wanted to find a different ride to school. In our talk with her, we acknowledged her feelings and supported her in her sadness. We also wanted to find a way to remind her to hang on to Jesus.
"Those kids sure are acting like you're not very special. When they treat you that way how do you feel?" we asked.
This brought tears, and we hugged her to offer comfort.
"So, on this hand, are the kids who say you are little and dumb," I said. "And on this hand, is Jesus. He says you're special, and capable, and if He was picking a team He'd pick you first. So now, you have to decide who you're going to believe."
Callie has had to decide many times whose voice she was going to listen to for her sense of worth. There is no doubt that, sometimes, like you and me, she has chosen to listen to the wrong voice. That is our fight of faith, ongoing--to resist the temptation to find our life in anything and anyone but Christ. But Callie is growing just as we are.
Let's face facts: Even if our children begin their own faith journey and choose to believe they are loved and accepted by God because of Jesus's work on the cross, it does not mean that other kids are going to be transformed into nice people. And it doesn't mean our children won't feel hurt when hurtful things are said or done to them. But we can stop trying to control behaviors and feelings, and focus on value and identity. Our eternal value and identity are settled because of Christ. . . . Let me say it plainly: Our job as Christian parents is simply to draw our children's attention to what is real--what is true--and not to try to control how they feel.
Callie came home on the bus one day and said that bunch of kids were making fun of her. She was sad and scared, and wanted to find a different ride to school. In our talk with her, we acknowledged her feelings and supported her in her sadness. We also wanted to find a way to remind her to hang on to Jesus.
"Those kids sure are acting like you're not very special. When they treat you that way how do you feel?" we asked.
This brought tears, and we hugged her to offer comfort.
"So, on this hand, are the kids who say you are little and dumb," I said. "And on this hand, is Jesus. He says you're special, and capable, and if He was picking a team He'd pick you first. So now, you have to decide who you're going to believe."
Callie has had to decide many times whose voice she was going to listen to for her sense of worth. There is no doubt that, sometimes, like you and me, she has chosen to listen to the wrong voice. That is our fight of faith, ongoing--to resist the temptation to find our life in anything and anyone but Christ. But Callie is growing just as we are.
Let's face facts: Even if our children begin their own faith journey and choose to believe they are loved and accepted by God because of Jesus's work on the cross, it does not mean that other kids are going to be transformed into nice people. And it doesn't mean our children won't feel hurt when hurtful things are said or done to them. But we can stop trying to control behaviors and feelings, and focus on value and identity. Our eternal value and identity are settled because of Christ. . . . Let me say it plainly: Our job as Christian parents is simply to draw our children's attention to what is real--what is true--and not to try to control how they feel.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
on divorce and remarriage
This is an excerpt from the same commentary (see previous post):
"Those who use Matthew 5:32, in particular those trying to determine the meaning of 'except on the grounds of porneias' in order to decide if and when divorce may be justified, unfortunately transform the text from one of permission to legalistic exchange.. What is crucial is not the question of when a marriage may be dissolved, but given the new dispensation the question should be how Christians should understand marriage. In similar fashion the question is not whether a divorced woman should be allowed to marry, but what kind of community must a church be that does not make it a matter of necessity for such a woman to remarry. If Christians do not have to marry, if women who have been abandoned do not have to remarry, then surely the church must be a community of friendship that is an alternative to the loneliness of our world. At the very least, any community capable of sustaining singleness as a way of life must be a community based on trust made possible by the speaking of truth to one another" (70).
"Those who use Matthew 5:32, in particular those trying to determine the meaning of 'except on the grounds of porneias' in order to decide if and when divorce may be justified, unfortunately transform the text from one of permission to legalistic exchange.. What is crucial is not the question of when a marriage may be dissolved, but given the new dispensation the question should be how Christians should understand marriage. In similar fashion the question is not whether a divorced woman should be allowed to marry, but what kind of community must a church be that does not make it a matter of necessity for such a woman to remarry. If Christians do not have to marry, if women who have been abandoned do not have to remarry, then surely the church must be a community of friendship that is an alternative to the loneliness of our world. At the very least, any community capable of sustaining singleness as a way of life must be a community based on trust made possible by the speaking of truth to one another" (70).
Monday, June 09, 2008
sermon on the mount
I'm reading Stanley Hauerwas's commentary on Matthew and he has a really interesting interpretation of the Sermon on the Mount:
"The sermon is not a heroic ethic. It is the constitution of a people. You cannot live by the demands of the sermon on your own, but that is the point. The demands of the sermon are designed to make us depend on God and one another (Hauerwas 1993, 63-72)" (61).
I suppose he's quoting himself in this section. :)
"The sermon, therefore, is not a list of requirements, but rather a description of the life of a people gathered by and around Jesus. To be saved is to be so gathered. That is why the Beautitudes are the interpretive key to the whole sermon--precisely because they are not recommendations. No one is asked to go out and try to be poor in spirit or to mourn or to be meek. Rather, Jesus is indicating that given the reality of the kingdom we should not be surprised to find among those who follow him those who are poor in spirit, those who mourn, those who are meek" (61).
"The sermon is not a heroic ethic. It is the constitution of a people. You cannot live by the demands of the sermon on your own, but that is the point. The demands of the sermon are designed to make us depend on God and one another (Hauerwas 1993, 63-72)" (61).
I suppose he's quoting himself in this section. :)
"The sermon, therefore, is not a list of requirements, but rather a description of the life of a people gathered by and around Jesus. To be saved is to be so gathered. That is why the Beautitudes are the interpretive key to the whole sermon--precisely because they are not recommendations. No one is asked to go out and try to be poor in spirit or to mourn or to be meek. Rather, Jesus is indicating that given the reality of the kingdom we should not be surprised to find among those who follow him those who are poor in spirit, those who mourn, those who are meek" (61).
Saturday, June 07, 2008
hmmm
Nothing's actually happened, but looking "foreign" over here during hard times doesn't feel good. I'm glad I'll be moving to LA where I'll blend into the background a little better.
Thursday, June 05, 2008
what???
Dialysis in Malaysia costs about RM4,000 a month!!!!!! That's at least USD 1,200 a month in medical bills. My dad has to start treatment soon. Well, I guess it's a good thing I'm moving to a postdoc salary instead of a graduate student stipend.
Still, the postdoc doesn't pay that much for LA living expenses . . . I guess the belt will remain firmly cinched.
Still, the postdoc doesn't pay that much for LA living expenses . . . I guess the belt will remain firmly cinched.
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