looking in the mirror

Last weekend, after a phone conversation with an old friend, Karen (currently in Arkansas), I had to face up to the fact that I'm less logical than I'd like to believe. I don't mean to say that there aren't reasons that inform my thoughts and actions, but that those reasons follow the "logic" of the situation less than they do the logics of my heart. By that I mean that the values I hold important will motivate the decisions I make.

To me, my decisions are highly logical, but they are often logical only within the value-system that makes up my world-view and they may not always seem logical to someone else. But besides that, without consciously choosing to do so, I will make decisions that will cause the least emotional disturbance in my life. And to me, that is also very "logical" but someone who does not share the same fears or joys will not think me very "logical." :)

In other words, my emotions and intuition are often dominate my thought-processes rather than the "cold hard facts" (if it's every possible to see the world that way!) of what's happening "outside" of me.

This explains why my old college buddy, Cat, often had to stop me from time to time and give me "the look." She gives me "the look" whenever I'm doing something that makes perfect z-sense, but can often be strange or sometimes inappropriate to everyone else.

Thank God for friends like Cat and Karen who help me become more adept at navigating life!