Saturday

I saw the wave coming but couldn't dodge it. My shoes got wet.

"Kingdom"

Alright, come on, let's go!

Said "Hello, how you doing? You took your time"
When I met You at the corner of insanity
I didn't know what I was doing, just wasting time
It was clear I couldn't see

And You knew that I was looking for something or someone new
I heard You knocking but I couldn't take the truth
See my reflection but I can't make out my face
I thought I heard a whisper that You say
I heard You say

Ooh, let 'em be forgiven
Let 'em be, Father
I heard You say
Ooh, welcome to the Kingdom
My sons and daughters

I feel the sound of many waters, it hits my chest
Like I wasn't even shining, started flickering
A voice beyond my understanding, it pulled me in
It didn't matter where I've been

And You knew that I was looking for something or someone new
I heard You knocking but I couldn't take the truth
See my reflection but I can't make out my face
I thought I heard a whisper that You say
I heard You say

Ooh, let 'em be forgiven
Let 'em be, Father
I heard You say
Ooh, welcome to the Kingdom
My sons and daughters
I heard You say

Ooh, let 'em be forgiven
Let 'em be, Father
I heard You say
Ooh, welcome to the Kingdom
My sons and daughters

Come into the light
Come into the light
All of Heaven's waiting for You
Just step inside
Come into the light
Come into the light
All of Heaven's waiting for You
Just step inside
Come into the light
Come into the light
All of Heaven's waiting for You
Just step inside
Come into the light
Come into the light
All of Heaven's waiting for You
Just step inside

Ooh, let 'em be forgiven
Let 'em be, Father
I heard You say
Ooh, welcome to the Kingdom
My sons and daughters
I heard You say

Ooh, let 'em be forgiven
Let 'em be, Father
I heard You say
Ooh, welcome to the Kingdom
My sons and daughters

My toddler niece carried her mom's phone to show me the kitchen on video call (I never saw it though). As she was walking she whispered to herself, "我的English不好," and it broke my heart. 

Father, hear my cry. 

And still....

Just thinking again today that God pursued me long before I ever thought to seek Him out. God is my future because He was everywhere in my past. Hannah! The answer to prayer that was set into motion twenty-one years ago!

Why do my hands still hold on to grubby, broken things when my Father wants to put His hand in mine?

Thankful that God is infinitely more patient than I am ....

Toilet paper

The things you learn

I didn't know that WhatsApp has auto-reply.

Winter to summer in one night

Coronavirus tales

Bumped into my boss in the corridor and he was surprised to see me, but I explained that I live within walking distance, and the walk is never crowded. Hardly anyone is here too so I feel very safe coming to work.

I think many people would like to get out of HK at this point.

Well, Isaiah 30:15-18 for me.

"Fear tells you that you will not be able to cope. Faith tells you that your Father in heaven knows when you will need strength to cope and he will supply all you need just in time." -- Nicky Gumbel

the thing with God

I was just thinking that despite all the trials for the past few months, I can't complain too much because God has given me a lot of what I have said is my "treasure," that is, to be able to learn. God has a sense of humor. In the last few months, He has taught me a great deal. Despite the pain, there has been a great deal of pleasure too.

I need to be careful what I ask for. He takes us at our words.

work humor

I often get password-protected files at work. Usually, they are randomly generated. The latest password chosen by one of our administrative staff is "2020beHealthy."

Haha.

The best story ever told

In times of struggle--and even in the best of times--our hearts long to hear the gospel story again and again. The story of God pursuing us, even to the point of death.

#coronavirus

Sundays

My pastors pranking each other.

After a run and workout

Wow

I was really struggling with this and I asked the Holy Spirit, how do I know I have really put something to death? We know that Isaac never really died. What if a part of me still hopes that my "Isaac" never really dies? Is that truly faith?

And the HS pointed out that while Isaac didn't die, Jesus really did die for me. But in the process, He broke the power of death. Because of what Jesus did, nothing truly ever dies anymore.

When we put things on the altar, they are no longer bound by death. By His power and resurrection, God gives them new life. These gifts may undergo transformation, but we can trust that that transformation is for good because look at Jesus.

Even in Isaac's case, he was never truly bound by death! God always took that death upon Himself (via Jesus). Abraham believed even when he didn't understand.... Wow.

Church care group retreat

My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

Psalms 73:26

Keeping Track

It's interesting to note now that I'm back to "normal" life, i.e. not having people constantly around me and not having to get on buses, trains, or navigate strange streets that God has been changing things. He hasn't changed things on the outside, but I feel a change on the inside.

Compared to previous experiences, I feel so much more peace and rest even if I did go through periods of mourning, grief, and wrestling. I might still go through future bouts of grief and wrestling, but I know with so much certainty that God is working things out in the unseen. This certainty was never available to me before.

God gave me words of encouragement from C and non-C in my life, and confirmed multiple times that I only need to be still and that He is the one who fights my battle.

My challenge this year: break the habit of looking ahead and "needing" to know what is coming up. 

This is a tough one. It's something I've always done and "needed."

Gosh. 

Psalm 37:7 Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices!

Last meal

It's so cold here. Great food, and I have been met with kindness every time was lost. But 90% of women wear the same shade of lipstick.

New Year's Eve

Sitting at a cafe with Irene, Pauline, and Rebecca in Seoul waiting to countdown.

The last couple of months were super hard (family and work).

But God has shown up to heal and He has given me many promises.

Emancipation.
Open, wide road.

I don't like my situation right now but God knows what He's doing. As much as I don't like 2019, I will give thanks for my God who uses all things for my good.

My resolution always seems to be "trust."

Pyeongchang

Thankful for friends

This never gets old

View from my aunt's balcony

Other contexts

I didn't realize how wound up I am until I got here, back in a different context, and among friends whose lives are different from mine.

Why am I so wound up inside when I know God who created the stars, the seas, and everything in between is on my side?

Reading the Word calms my insides like nothing else does. Father's words are truly living and active.

My friends and their kids

It was nice to have a temporary distraction...